Saturday, March 7, 2009

Instructions Not Included

30 years ago this month the doctor said those words every parent wants to hear, "Run for your life because it will never be the same after today!"

Actually what he did say was, "Congratulations, it's a BOY!" Same difference but what the hell.

I had 2 beautiful, sweet, quiet, well behaved little girls at home.What was I supposed to do with a boy? I didn't know what to do with that thing between his legs when I changed him. Every time I took his diaper off it went straight up in the air and started leaking! Was there a shut off valve somewhere on this kid? And then before I even left the hospital they circumcised him! Thank God I'm not Jewish because I've carried enough guilt over that already! Poor Baby!

Take him home and please don't make him wear anything remotely pink, purple or lacey. Back then we didn't have the ultrasounds that told you the sex of the baby so I had no idea what I was having and wasn't prepared for a boy. The clothes I had were hand me downs from his sisters. Thank goodness there were some sleepers in there that were yellow otherwise he might be even more traumatized than he already is from being cut!

A whole new experience for me after 2 girls let me tell you. What they say is true. Boys are definitely different to raise then girls. From the very beginning he was going to let me know things were going to be his way. He was a cute baby but he liked attention and cried when he wanted something. Man did he have a temper!!! He still does to this day.

Being the baby I tended to spoil him a little and I will be the first to admit that. Probably didn't do him any favors but I think all mothers tend to spoil their babies. He got into some trouble as he got older and after our divorce there was some drugs involved. Guess it was kind of tough being the only guy (at the young age of 13) in a houseful of females. I sure didn't know how to be a male role model for him then.

We went through some rough times for a while. Then he straightened up and seemed to be headed on the right path for a while. He moved to Iowa about 3 years ago which has been rough on me (now all 3 of my children live in either Nebraska or Iowa and hundreds of miles from me) cuz this is my baby. Last summer he had one of his moods and left a party we had while visiting down there and he hasn't talked to me since. I have continued to send him Christmas cards and presents and I even tried texting him with no response.

I just sent him a Birthday card and present and will continue to let him know I love him.

Why don't t they give us instruction booklets with these babies when we have them? We get one with every other thing we buy. And God knows we pay enough over our lifetime for our kids. If not in money with our emotions. Maybe if I could look up in the troubleshooting section, I could figure out what to do with my son and how to fix it? The again, maybe not.

Happy 30Th Birthday to my Baby! No matter what you do you can't change that.


April said...

I pray it gets better for you. Just keep being his mom. Sounds like thats all you can do at this point.

Christina said...

That was beautiful Sheri. Don't ever stop showing him you love him. My son decided he wanted to live with his dad about 2 years ago... After seven years without even seeing his dad much. It is hard. He's almost six hours from me, so I don't get to see him as much as I'd like, plus it seems they're never home when I call... but I always make the effort.. by mail, by phone, whatever I can do. Hopefully he'll remember that and know I love him. Surely, your son will too. /here's a hug for you /

Tara said...

I'm sorry my brother has caused you so much pain. Some day it will get better if not for us all at least for you. He has always been a mom's boy, and he will come around again. I know in my heart of heart. Just keep loving him.

binks said...

Keep sending love and maybe he'll soften his heart. He just doesn't realize what a gift it is to have a mother that loves him and is willing to show it.